So I don't want to make a really bad excuse for not updating the blog for ages but this excuse is true. The computer was playing up. So I'm sorry its late but here is my 25 Rules For Children post, that I should have posted ages ago.
Hi,
So I saw this link:
And I thought it was so bad that I wrote my own. If its not completely obvious these are sarcastic, and silly, do not take them seriously.
25
rules for Children
1. Never say please, as you don not want the grown ups to think that you are too good, as they may expect more of you - like doing the washing up!
2. Do not say thank you. If you are too nice they will not be disciplined enough to do whatever you want.
3. Interrupt whenever possible. It shows them who is boss.
4. Do not say things like "Excuse me". They will think they have a choice other than to listen to you.
5. If you want to do something, do not listen to the grown ups. They never understand anything.
6. Do not worry about what your parents like. Make sure they know what YOU like so you can get the best Christmas presents.
7. Do not let your parents know how good they are. Give them a rare smile or a mild grin if you think they've spent enough money on you.
8. If people say "How are you?" tell them all about it, but don't let them tell you about themselves - you haven't got all day.
9. When you have your friends' over instruct them in these rules and even give them a copy to keep.
10. Never knock before entering a room. You need to make people know how important you are and knocking is for small people.
11. When you phone someone make sure that you tell them exactly what you want and if you get interrupted - there is no worse crime!
12. Make sure that they are appreciative of your wonderfulness.
13. If your parents swear make them wash their mouths out. Your ears do not deserve such abuse.
14. Call your parent mean names to make sure they don't get overconfident. Write down the good ones so you can repeat them.
15. Make every day fun and exciting. You only have one life and your parents have already had most of theirs!
16. If a play or show is boring make sure that EVERYONE knows so that they don't make the same mistake again. It's for their own good.
17. If you bump into someone make THEM apologise.
18. Cover your mouth when you sneeze and always make sure that there is an adult nearby to wipe your hand on afterwards.
19. When you walk through a door someone should always hold it for you. If they don't kick up a fuss.
20. If you find your parents working on something, punish them. They shouldn't have time for that as they should be caring for you.
21. If someone asks you a favour you should refuse unless you can benefit.
22. If someone helps you do not thank them. They should do it anyway.
23. Make sure they make your food properly. Do not let them get away with burning or undercooking or any mistakes in anything YOU have to eat.
24. Keep yourself kitted out with an adult and a rucksack (that the adult carries, obviously)at all times so that anything you need when out and about is right at your side.
25. Make sure everything is within reach at mealtimes. You shouldn't have to reach out or ask for anything or risk dipping your sleeves in your perfect meal.
1. Never say please, as you don not want the grown ups to think that you are too good, as they may expect more of you - like doing the washing up!
2. Do not say thank you. If you are too nice they will not be disciplined enough to do whatever you want.
3. Interrupt whenever possible. It shows them who is boss.
4. Do not say things like "Excuse me". They will think they have a choice other than to listen to you.
5. If you want to do something, do not listen to the grown ups. They never understand anything.
6. Do not worry about what your parents like. Make sure they know what YOU like so you can get the best Christmas presents.
7. Do not let your parents know how good they are. Give them a rare smile or a mild grin if you think they've spent enough money on you.
8. If people say "How are you?" tell them all about it, but don't let them tell you about themselves - you haven't got all day.
9. When you have your friends' over instruct them in these rules and even give them a copy to keep.
10. Never knock before entering a room. You need to make people know how important you are and knocking is for small people.
11. When you phone someone make sure that you tell them exactly what you want and if you get interrupted - there is no worse crime!
12. Make sure that they are appreciative of your wonderfulness.
13. If your parents swear make them wash their mouths out. Your ears do not deserve such abuse.
14. Call your parent mean names to make sure they don't get overconfident. Write down the good ones so you can repeat them.
15. Make every day fun and exciting. You only have one life and your parents have already had most of theirs!
16. If a play or show is boring make sure that EVERYONE knows so that they don't make the same mistake again. It's for their own good.
17. If you bump into someone make THEM apologise.
18. Cover your mouth when you sneeze and always make sure that there is an adult nearby to wipe your hand on afterwards.
19. When you walk through a door someone should always hold it for you. If they don't kick up a fuss.
20. If you find your parents working on something, punish them. They shouldn't have time for that as they should be caring for you.
21. If someone asks you a favour you should refuse unless you can benefit.
22. If someone helps you do not thank them. They should do it anyway.
23. Make sure they make your food properly. Do not let them get away with burning or undercooking or any mistakes in anything YOU have to eat.
24. Keep yourself kitted out with an adult and a rucksack (that the adult carries, obviously)at all times so that anything you need when out and about is right at your side.
25. Make sure everything is within reach at mealtimes. You shouldn't have to reach out or ask for anything or risk dipping your sleeves in your perfect meal.
I hope you enjoyed my rules.
Bye
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